The Words
Run no. 75
The Bridford Inn,
Hares; Manpig, Forrest Stump & Shatnav
Well, don’t faint, I’ve managed to avoid doing the words now
for 4 plus years, but I couldn’t duck Manpig’s
radar yesterday, and so got collared! Be
warned. It won’t be pretty!
A small but select bunch of hashers circled up in the
Bridford Inn carpark at 12.30pm for Run no. 75 of the A2B. All hashers were chomping at the bit and ready
to go. But wait, where were the
hares? Oh, of course, it’s Manpig, Forrest Stump and Shatnav. It could be a long wait. To be fair, there had been a deluge the
evening before and indeed just before us
‘last minute lil’s’ turned up, it
had once again , bucketed down on the early bird’s. So they were probably out re-laying the
trail.
Sure enough, like the diva’s they are, the three amigos
arrived at 1pm. Manpig stumbling out of the passenger door of the car . Umm, laying a trail, or dutch courage early sampling
of the down down’s?? Forrest
Stump – announcing he had to be somewhere very important, and Shatnav, clutching a map for dear life.
More evidence of this ‘early sampling’ ensured when Manpig launched into the description of
the trail. The trail indeed had to be
rechecked and re-laid in parts. It was 3
and on, originally laid in sawdust and now some re-laid in flour. ManPig confessed that he had got lost whilst
re-laying some of the trail.
Trail Instructions were;
·
If you end up in a bog you’ve gone the wrong
way.
·
If you see a white horse in a field with a
jacket on, that’s the right field.
·
If you’re waist deep in bracken , that’s the
wrong way.
·
The trail was mostly laid in sawdust , but when
you see flour, follow that and don’t follow the sawdust, cos I got lost
relaying it.
·
The flour
is not actually flour , its Kaolin, but follow that anyway.
As I mentioned, it appeared
a bit of ‘sampling’ had been occurring.
Shortie asked ‘how long’ , and to all but Captain Peacock’s and Meavy
Maid’s dismay, ManPig replied , ‘the short’s are 13.8 and the long’s 14 something’
(At this point I was trying to conjure up symptoms of a rare and debilitating,
but very short lived illness that would mean I could snooze in the vehicle
whilst my fellow hashers went about their business – anyway whilst I was
pondering this, I did not have my wits about me, and ManPig’s beady eye rested on me and said’ Peanut ‘s doing the
words’. And you, dear reader , have paid dearly for my
momentary lapse of concentration.)
Paperwork asked
if the trail was going to start any time today, whereupon Manpig welcomed Captain
Peacock as an A2B virgin then shouted ‘On On that way’, and we set off out of the car park and onto
trail.
Manpig was
sweeping the trail and the ‘longs’ and Shatnav was sweeping the ‘shorts’.
On down the hill we ran….
This is where it all goes a bit wrong. With my rubbish sense of direction and
complete lack of memory of where we’ve been, the actual details of the hash are
a bit sketchy. So here are some bits and pieces.
The trail started and On On
we ran with Captain
Peacock, Paperwork, Fester and Meavy
Maid happily checking the checks.
A long short split presented itself and the pack
split. The shorts ran on with Shatnav clutching his map with
determination and conviction until after a couple of miles we reached a
junction. Signposted ahead was Bridford
and to the left Moretonhampstead or back the way we had come. Shatnav
looking a little puzzled checked his map and gingerly indicated that
he might be ‘a bit lost’ and perhaps we should go left and
see if we can find the trail from another direction. So we set off until we came upon a ‘X’ ‘Oh don’t mind that’ said Shatnav, that only applies if you are
on the trail going the right way!
On On we ran , re joining the trail and eventually met up
with the ‘Long’s . On and through
Clampitt plantation, we came upon a
bemused Fester who, as FRB, checked
out in 3 directions and thinking we had passed him by had carried on running
looking for the pack. He soon thought
better of it and whilst he sat and pondered, up we walked , oh I mean , up we
‘ran’ towards him!
Early on in the trial Hairy
Mollusc running through the patches of dappled light in Laployd
plantation.
The day threatened rain and we watched as we seemed to run
be running towards dark clouds & rain in the distance but the hash gods
were kind to us and we had a perfect days sunshine and breeze. Some showers early on went unnoticed as we
ran through the protective canopy of the woods and the plantation.
Captain Peacock checking
across the Kennick Reservoir dam.
On on we ran and through the plantation out through the
bracken until we saw looming up ahead the human head like profile that was
‘Blackingstone Rocks’
After an ascent up the very handy steps on to
the windy top of the rock , we were rewarded with stunning 360 views of
Dartmoor and beyond. Even the hash
hounds came for a look. ‘Moth’ the hash
hound virgin showed no fear climbing up and down the steep steps. After Kura
had her little ‘top of the world’ adventure, she descended a little more gracefully and
carefully. Perhaps to make sure that ‘Paraprick’ her minder wouldn’t come a
cropper !
On we ran to our first beer stop in a little pull in signed
‘ only for use for those with limited mobility’. That was definitely us!
After re-stocking on
the vast array of chocs, jelly babies, peanuts, softies and beer we were
ready for the off again.
Not
long into the second leg and after crossing a trail, in the distance could be
heard a strange garbled cry- Mof, Mof
,MOF, MOF, MOOFFFF!!!! On and on the cries went gaining urgency and
emphasis. We finally came to the corner
of the field where we spied Paperwork
and Captain Peacock tearing around
trying to catch hold of ‘Moth’ (Paperwork and Sorepoint’s
dogsitting charge for the weekend), who had thought it would be great fun to go
and play with those other white ‘dogs’ with the fluffy coats! It was a close
one, but the human hashers finally managed to corral the hash hound and all was
again well in the world again!
OnOn we ran through fields, lanes
and bracken until we came up to Hingston Rocks – Lovely VP of Moretonhampstead
and for the really keen eyed, Bovey Castle .
From then the instructions from the
hare were;
Go on down the hill until you find a dead tree, then you’re
on the right track. (Yes ‘ a dead tree’
– on Dartmoor – there aren’t many of them now are there?)
Anyone find that one dead tree yet? Who said that?
Sure enough, as we emerged out of the shoulder
height bracken, we came upon the promised
‘dead tree’ and after a swift head count to ensure none were lost to the bracken, were back on trail down towards
the B3212. Across the road we went and
on across Mardon down .
Back through the woods and out where we came on the oasis
and it’s keeper , Larks vomit in
the beer car.
Clifford Bridge – 2nd Beer Stop
Everyone fuelled up again and after agreeing there would be
another beer stop before ‘B’ we headed off again through Hitchcome wood, past
Wooston Castle fort, and Hore wood. All
mainly down hill and nice and ‘bouncy’.
A bit too ‘bouncy’ for Shortie who unfortunately took a flying lesson and
face planted. Maybe it was because she
was distracted by Sorepoint
announcing she loved ‘going down’! Lucky
man Paperwork.
All that excitement was quite enough and with that we all
tripped and skipped down and out of the woods with the welcome sight of Fingle
Bridge waiting for us. Oh , and Meavy Maid perched on the bridge waiting. I think she had been there quite a while!
We had arrived now at the 3rd beer stop. The hare announces ; ‘Right well we’re here
and the cars are here but the ‘B’ is a couple of miles away and apparently the
pub is shut.’ Tumbleweed…. Dum de dum
Er um….. Let’s call
this ‘B’ - And everyone cheered .
Time for the down downs;
·
Paperwork
chasing Moth the hash hound
·
Shatnav’s
– no surprises, for getting the short’s
lost. Even though he had a map
·
Captain
Peacock - for being an FRB – that’s
maybe not the right reason but it’ll do
·
Shortie
for taking a flying lesson and face planting
·
Manpig
for being man pig
·
Sorepoint
for saying she liked ‘going down
Everyone then piled into the ‘ferry’ cars and were
transported back to their own cars and the welcoming fayre of the Bridford
Inn.
All in all a terrific trail, beautiful scenery and view
points and great soft trails underfoot.
Always entertaining, thank you ManPig,
Forrest and Shatnav.
On On Peanut
X
(p.s. ‘Fester’ is not
really called ‘Fester’ !)
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